Everybody loves CJ7. That is, except the people who didn’t like it. There are actually quite a few, judging from the film’s lukewarm-to-positive response both locally and on the web. Personally speaking, the movie isn’t great nor is it terrible; its worst offense is that it’s simply a bit of a let down, especially considering that it’s Stephen Chow’s first movie in 3 years and that he really isn’t in it very much.

Not sure why he should care though. The movie is making bank. And man, that CJ7 is one cute critter.

“I love you, my little cash cow.”

However, they could make about 40 extra bucks if they could stop something like this:

Two McDonald’s coupons can get you a copy of CJ7

What’s in this blurry photo that I took with my mobile phone? Why, it’s none other than a shoe box where you can deposit 20 Hong Kong dollars voluntarily. Afterwards you can take one of the paper-sleeved VCD copies of CJ7 the nice people who set up the box have left next to the shoe box. Whether or not it actually contains a copy of CJ7 is a good question. It could be just a trailer, or maybe a blank CD. Worst case scenario: it’s a copy of Wonder Women.

By the way, nobody is manning this little kiosk because, well, this is illegal. I suppose there might be somebody watching the stand from afar, but nobody came out of the shadows to kneecap me when I took this photo. So maybe nobody was nearby. Anyway, I hear they’re all in Canada looking for this guy:

 
No caption required

HK Customs, if you’re reading this: run now to the Kwai Hing MTR Station in the New Territories. You’ll be able to sieze about ten bootleg copies of CJ7, not to mention the 40 illegally-earned HK dollars that are sitting in the shoe box. I wish you all the luck in the world. Frankly, all bootlegged VCDs or DVDs should end up like this:

The deserved fate of all illegal media

Sadly, the above disc is genuine. It’s been stuffed in the dirt to ward off birds at a local community garden. One would think that using tinfoil or some other form of shiny, bird-repelling trash would work just as well, but nope, they’re using Hong Kong movies to keep birds from eating their flowers. 

At least the movie they’ve tossed is Rules of the Game, a nineties triad movie that would never qualify for a classic genre retrospective. It could be worse. They could be misusing a good movie like, say, Benny Chan’s excellent nineties actioner Big Bullet.

Oh, sorry, they’re using that too:

This VCD is a metaphor for Jordan Chan’s career

What does all this show us? Probably what most of us already know: that people in Hong Kong don’t really value entertainment, much less the media its encoded onto. An old VCD is worth more as a makeshift scarecrow than it is as a form of entertainment. Sadly, the same garden also contained some discarded DVDs, including a little movie called The Fellowship of the Ring, so this poor respect for the creative work of others applies to movies from pretty much anywhere. It’s just disposable junk to a lot of people in Hong Kong, and is not worth more than 2 hours of braindead time. Apparently, over 10,000 wasted man-hours devoted to media hype and celebrity scandal are far more valuable and necessary.

Man, I’m depressed. Not even Louis Koo hawking watches can make me feel better.

“My steely gaze instructs you to buy my watch.”