Note: This blog expresses only the opinions of the blog owner, and does not represent the opinion of any organization or blog that is associated with Damn you, Kozo!.
It’s vacation time for LoveHKFilm.com - or at least, the person who runs it - so that means another 2 or 3 weeks of hand-wringing as we wonder if the site will ever get updated again. I’ll break the suspense by revealing that it will, indeed, get an update someday. After all, where else will I publish my review of KING OF SPY 2008?
This movie could be playing on You Tube right now
Also, Kevin Ma plans on reviewing Super Duper Communist Movie THE FOUNDING OF A REPUBLIC, which details the rise of Communism in the great country of China. I will not be around to see the movie, or I would review it myself. As has been noted on fine Internet publications, everyone who works at this site loves China. *whistles innocently*
Some photos from FOUNDING OF A REPUBLIC:
Donnie Yen and Vicki Zhao as a couple who celebrate
their 10th anniversary by joining the Communist Party
Eva Huang as the Cutest Member of the Communist Party™
Actually, what I’d really like to do is live blog the movie, so I can record the time that every single star appears. Such a list will surely help a ton of potential viewers who want to fast-forward through the film to see the stars (this is probably 80% of the Internet). Sadly, I don’t expect to see Huang Bo in the film, which is a travesty of cinema. Every film needs Huang Bo.
Huang Bo: making movies awesome since 2006
When I return from my trip, there will be a couple of new Hong Kong films on offer, namely the Herman Yau double feature SPLIT SECOND MURDER and REBELLION.
If you’re not Chinese and can name everyone
in this poster, you win a prize
The highlight of REBELLION: a leapfrog competition
The first is an idol-packed Halloween picture while the second is a long-in-the-can triad picture that was teased for release back in 2008. It’s sad the film actually didn’t get a release in 2008 since it stars Shawn Yue, who at this time last year was considered the Hardest Working Man in Hong Kong Cinema. The man had 10 features released in 2007 and 2008, and his only one so far this year will be a holdover from last year. What happened?
“People, hire me for your movies! I’ll work for food or tips.
Hell, I’ll work for you if you can recognize me on the street.”
When I return, the Hong Kong Asian Film Festival will be in full swing too. I may or may not review a slew of movies from it, as it’s been my recent pattern to only review Hong Kong films while carefully picking among the rest. I’d leave more to Kevin, but he’s a busy guy, what with school, his blog, the East-West Screen podcast and also his personal life. That he even visits LoveHKFilm.com must take precious minutes out of his day. He won’t get those minutes back either.
“Come on…who has time to waste at LoveHKFilm.com?”
Takeshi has a point. Anyway, here are my planned screenings at the HKAFF:
THE WARRIOR AND THE WOLF (with Joe Odagiri in attendance)
THIRST (with Park Chan-Wook in attendance)
INTO A DREAM LOVE EXPOSURE (again!)
CROWS ZERO 2
AIN’T NO TOMORROWS
BE SURE TO SHARE
AIR DOLL (with nobody in attendance)
KIMJONGILIA
BICYCLE SIGHS
HAZARD
FINDING HER
SUMMER WARS
DAD, HOW ARE YOU?
WHEAT (starring Fan Bing-Bing)
WEAVING GIRL (Starring Yu Nan and Guo Tao. Guo Tao!)
PASTRY
BEIJING IS COMING
COW (starring Huang Bo!)
AT THE END OF DAYBREAK
SEVEN 2 ONE (Directed by Danny Pang)
…plus maybe some short films and some Bollywood, if I can squeeze it in. You can check out the complete list on their just-launched website.
That’s quite a list, huh? If you’re going to the HKAFF and select these films for your viewing pleasure then you risk running into me. If I do see you, I promise not to spit on you, but besides that, everything is fair game.
“Ha ha, people spitting at me is nothing! I’m used to much worse!”
Let’s wrap up this obligatory September post with a look at Leon Lai’s last concert, entitled DREAM WEDDING. The concert occurred a couple of months ago, but I’m only blogging about it now. It was a simple affair, with a small stage rather than one of those crazy stages inspired by TRANSFORMERS. As expected, Leon was all professional charm, meaning he was suave and punctual. At the end of the concert here was a Typhoon Signal number 8 and he practically sprinted off the stage.
“Typhoon warning? Screw the encore - I’m out of here!”
While at the concert, I snapped some pictures. Here’s a good shot of my vantage point:
Once again, Leon Lai is upstaged by cables
And here’s a photo of Leon Lai and special guest Janice Man, who wowed the audience with her red dress if not her actual talent.
The cables are still the most interesting part of this photo
And, finally a cable-free photo:
Leon gives the cheap seats some love
Overall, the concert was enjoyable but a little on the low-energy side. Then again, Leon Lai is not one of those “go all out, bust my ass” performers like Aaron “I almost die in concerts” Kwok. Leon is more of a suave customer or cool cat, which comes off charming at concerts but kind of dull on the big screen.
At least at concerts he’ll do his own stunts:
Is it hot in here or is it just Leon? Oh, it’s the fire.
My favorite song that evening was the wonderfully titled, “I Love You OK”, which is a lyric and song title that confuses me. Does “OK” represent the measurement of Leon’s love? If so, then the poor girl on the receiving end should look for someone who actually loves her more than just “OK”. Saying that you love someone “OK” is like saying that you love someone “somewhat”. Is that what girls are looking for nowadays?
Janice Man is looking for that number on Leon’s left leg
The other reading of the title is “I love you, okay?!?”, which implies that Leon Lai is impatient in declaring his love for his girlfriend. She probably asked for his feelings while he was busy playing BATMAN: ARKHAM ASYLUM for his PlayStation 3, and right before he got the coveted 40-hit Freeflow Combo, she annoyed him by asking “Hey, how do you feel about me?”. Well, if that’s the case - that Leon was going to get another Trophy to show off his leet status on the PlayStation Network, and then was rudely interrupted - then we fully sympathize with his impatience.
Either way, we know the truth: Leon Lai is not much of a boyfriend.
“Don’t bother me when I’m eating fruit, woman!”
Check out the song for yourself. BONUS: the video also features Athena Chu.
By the way, seeing Leon Lai in concert means that I have now seen every single one of the Sky Kings - Andy Lau, Jacky Cheung, Aaron Kwok and Leon Lai - after arriving here in Hong Kong nearly five years ago. This accomplishment brings me ever closer to getting the hell out of Dodge. Seeing all the Sky Kings in concert was one of the biggest things I wanted to accomplish during my stay in Hong Kong, and with that out of the way probably the most glaring thing not yet completed is meeting Ekin Cheng. If I can accomplish that, it may spell the end of LoveHKFilm.com in Hong Kong. Don’t worry, we’ll still review DVDs.
“You’ll still review DVDs? That was NOT what I wanted to hear!”
Man, it’s been awhile. And it’ll probably be a lot longer before I write in this thing again because in a few short hours, I’m off to Italy. Again. My toys will miss me:
Carue and Chopper will guard my Blu-ray collection.
This year is the second year that I’m attending the Far East Film Festival. I get to go because I contributed to their catalog and book, plus I’m fortunate enough to have saved enough money for a plane ticket. This is a special time of the year because it represents the end of a lot of stuff. The Hong Kong International Film Festival is over. The Hong Kong Film Awards and associated drama is over. The LoveHKFilm Awards and all the related busywork is over. All that’s left is the review writing, which I’ll get to when I get to. That’s what 2009 is about for me: not doing more than I have to.
Actually, I have no idea if that’s really the deal at the above store because I have yet to walk in and shop. I should, though, because nothing makes a person feel better in times of economic crisis than adding more useless crap to your apartment. Either way, the sign and its superb Engrish kicks ass.
If you’re paying attention, you’ll notice that we’ve just added a new blog, Ronin on Empty from longtime site reviewer Sanjuro. Now that his blog is here, I’ll let him handle all the personal stories and tangential topics, while I use my blog to cover official site business, e.g. dish on the LoveHKFilm Awards, plus installments of Kozo’s Mailbag and even some minor film-reviewing - some of it from writers who are not me.
This week, I’m featuring two reviews from some guy named Koh So who writes for YesAsia.com. You can find his work on YumCha!, YesAsia.com’s content platform. It’s a place where reviews, news, and other assorted Asian Entertainment goodies can be collected for use by people who use the fancy Internets. Koh So is impossibly more upbeat than I am, so whenever he reviews something, he spins it positive.
Completely minor announcement: there will be no “End of 2008″ post on this blog anytime soon, and barring another self-serving edition of Kozo’s Mailbag, I’ll probably be stepping away from this blog for a few more weeks.
Someone is already unhappy about the news:
“Whaddya mean no ‘End of 2008′ post?
What am I supposed to do now?”
NOTE: For this edition of Damn You Kozo, I’m combining a number of topics I was planning on writing separate blog entries about. Due to various reasons it’s been difficult getting anything off the ground, so I figured it was everything or nothing. Sadly, I have too many ideas to list everything, so why don’t we go with just five? Sounds like a plan.
Anyway, let’s get this over with.
Abandoned Blog Entry #1 OBAMA WINS, I CONSIDER MOVING BACK TO THE UNITED STATES
Aaaaaaaad, we’re back. These toys in my living room say “Hi”:
Clearly, my toy collection kicks ass
Anyway, the Hong Kong Asian Film Festival is now over. During that 17-day period I consumed 18 movies, 5 short films, 2 regular theatrical releases and plenty of bad food. Amazingly, I did not get sick, though I do recall nodding off during my screening of 881.
Wow, I actually updated this blog four times this month. It’s all because The Golden Rock has been too busy to blog reguarly. Once he returns full time, I will disappear for at least a month.
In case anyone cares, The Golden Rock is busy because of this thing:
Celebrate the Olympic spirit by letting
one of China’s mascots shoot you
Finally, Hong Kong movies are coming back to local cinemas, and like the gluttons for punishment that we are, LoveHKFilm.com will be there.
HK movies have been absent from local cinemas since the June 19th tag-team of City Without Baseball and Sparrow. Sure, there was Red Cliff and Kung Fu Hip-Hop, but neither were really Hong Kong movies. Hong Kong movies are movies starring local idols and character actors, and feature actual Hong Kong locations, Hong Kong-style pacing and wit, and probably some undue metaphor or existentialism. Donnie Yen is a plus, but he’s not a requirement.
Here’s Donnie talking to people who aren’t his mouth-breathing fans:
“I’m legendary, I tell you! Legendary!
Why won’t you morons believe me?”
Anyway, the seven-week embargo on Hong Kong films finally ended with the release of La Lingerie, which fits all the above requirements except for the one with Donnie Yen. Actual Hong Kong Cinema releases are still quiet throughout August, with only one confirmed release looming its semi-ugly head. It’s Forgive and Forget, the latest from Patrick Kong, the crazy auteur behind L For Love, L For Lies, Love is Not All Around, and Marriage with a Fool.
Scary hair never gets old
The movie stars the recently ubiquitous Andy On and Secret sweetheart Alice Tzeng, who is best described with the Zoolander phrase “She’s so hot right now.” Since it’s directed by Patrick Kong, it’s about relationships, and features melodrama and lots of crying. A twist ending is likely, too. Given the trailer, it also looks like it could be some sort of horror film - which makes it a wonder that the geek websites aren’t talking it up. Who knows, maybe it’ll be good enough for Tartan’s Asia Extreme line - that is, if Tartan were still around to have one.
Patrick Kong isn’t through yet this year. It looks like he may have another film out, making it three for 2008. If so, that makes Patrick Kong the new Johnnie To - at least, as far as his output is concerned. Sadly, I just said that Patrick Kong is “the new Johnnie To”. I fully expect my quote to be taken out of context and placed on an Australian DVD release of Forgive and Forget. Of course, by then it’ll be retitled Bloody Twins or Follicles of Death or something like that. They’ll think of something.
Sadly, that’s the only Hong Kong film that I am certain will be released in August. There was some indication that Rebellion, the latest Herman Yau film starring Shawn “I appear in everything” Yue and Elanne “I will soon appear in everything” Kong, would also debut in August. However, that is, as yet, unconfirmed. At least, it’s been hard for me to confirm, what with my inability to read Chinese. Four years here and I can’t even ride the bus properly. It’s just sad.
Here’s Herman Yau leading a toast honoring Hong Kong film’s continuing survival:
“Yes! Hong Kong Cinema survives for one more day!”
If you need your Herman Yau fix now, there’s another option: pick up a copy of Chaos, which came out directly on DVD only a few days ago. I can’t tell you anything about this movie because I haven’t seen it, nor have I heard much about it. It stars former LoveHKFilm Award Winner Andrew Lin, plus Gordon Lam, Crystal Tin, and Charmaine Fong. It looks vaguely related to gangs and violence so we’ll watch it even if it’s a direct to DVD release. We would be insulting our geek credentials if we skipped a Hong Kong movie with gangs or violence. Hopefully it’ll be extreme.
Who knew about this film?
Also coming to DVD at the same time is Fate, one of those long-delayed Fortune Star HD films produced by Andrew Lau. Directed by Raymond Yip, who recently co-directed the Award-winning Warlords, the film stars Miki Yeung, Alan Kuo, and maybe one other guy whose name I can’t remember. This is a film that has been on the Fortune Star website since sometime in 2006, so who knows if it’s good or not?
I knew about this film,
but was not particularly looking forward to it
I’ll see it anyway because, well, it’s a Hong Kong movie, and as everyone knows, this site reviews Hong Kong movies. We do review films from other countries, but only because we have to feed the beast that is our Alexa ranking. That may not be enough motivation one day. Privately, I wonder when the site will have to shut down completely because there are no more Hong Kong films. Alternately, we could change our name to LoveChinaFilmBecauseChinaInstructsIt.com. If China really does instruct it, I’ll gladly comply because it’s the legal and reasonable thing to do. The AK-47 pointed at my head will also help in my decision making.
In 2012, this will be Kozo in a Hong Kong cinema
That’s it for this installment of Damn You, Movie News. Next time I’ll dish about movies coming to cinemas in September - a group which includes new flicks with Louis Koo, Ekin Cheng, Sammi Cheng (maybe, not clear on this yet), and - wait for it - DONNIE YEN! Hong Kong Cinema will surely be back then.
In the meantime, please watch the Olympics. Really, there’s stuff there you should definitely see, like that Michael Phelps guy. Also, where else can you see a fifty foot-tall Andy Lau? I’m thinking he did this to himself to make it easier to play to the cheap seats.
“I went Goliath for my fans!”
As long as Andy Lau is alive, Hong Kong film will never die.
